This is hilarious it is from Nick Mamatas’ Live Journal blog:
TEN BITS OF ADVICE WRITERS SHOULD STOP GIVING ASPIRING WRITERS
1. DON’T GIVE UP
Consider your audience. Who are you telling not to give up? The illiterates, the douchebags, the certifiable graphomanics, the people who think watching a movie is the same as reading a book? Some people should give up. Most people should give up. Find out whether someone has any potential first before arbitrarily telling someone to waste years of their lives, and worse, moments of the lives of editors who have to look at their nonsense.
2. SHOW DON’T TELL
Fuck you. Is this bit of advice really so precious that everyone has to say it over and over? Like pretty much any three-word utterance it is oversimplified to the point of inaccuracy. Some things need showing, some things need telling. Figuring out which is which is part of the spooky art.
3. DON’T OVERPROMOTE YOURSELF, ESPECIALLY ON SOCIAL MEDIA
This is actually good advice, but futile, along the lines of this other excellent piece of advice: “Stop molesting children.” If you have to tell someone, they’re probably already beyond hope. I’ve even seen very specific protocols suggested like, “Be sure only every fifth social media utterance is promotional” or “Have a change of topic prepared” for in-person encounters. I don’t want to be stuck in a room with someone who can think of nothing to say that isn’t a commercial for his or her own work, but I certainly don’t want to be stuck in that room with someone who can think of something else to say…thanks to having prepared an index card for the topic. SO, HOW ABOUT THOSE CLOWNS IN CONGRESS? WHAT A BUNCH OF CLOWNS —